50% OF ARIZONA'S SENATORS ARE SANE, WELL, MAYBE 100% - "NOT INTENDED TO BE A FACTUAL STATEMENT."

Arizona residents must be so proud of their Senator.  

After getting caught making an outrageously incorrect statement, Senator Kyl's "handlers" came out with the excuse that Mr. Kyl's statement was: "NOT INTENDED TO BE A FACTUAL STATEMENT." So, according to the Senator's "handlers," anything can be said about anybody, as long as they come back 24 hours later and use the phrase - "NOT INTENDED TO BE A FACTUAL STATEMENT."

Stephen Colbert jumped on the Senator's latest Kyl-ism. Stephen has been posting several very funny Twitter statements, that have the phrase #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement posted at the end of each Tweet.

I have posted several of Mr. Colbert's Tweets that I think are the funniest.

(01) Jon Kyl bought a SodaStream so he could drink *carbonated* tears of the poor.   


(02) Jon Kyl is the only person who can sneeze with his penis. He calls it a "sneenis.

(03) Everything you would only do in the privacy of your own home, Jon Kyl prefers to do on a subway car.

(04) Jon Kyl developed his own line of hair care products just so he could test them on bunnies.  

(05) Jon Kyl was sent from the future to kill Sarah Conner.


(06) Jon Kyl sponsored S.410, which would ban happiness.


(07) Jon Kyl calls the underside of his Senate seat: "The Booger Graveyard."


(08) John Kyl is 90% prune juice.


(09) Once a year, Jon Kyl retreats to the Arizona Desert and deposits 2 million egg sacs under the sand.

(10) In 2009, Jon Kyl lost $380,000 wagering on dwarf tossing.


(11) Jon Kyl holds the Guinness World Record for "Largest Collection of Penis Enlargers."

(12) Jon Kyl's knees bend both ways. He's part racehorse.



__________________________________________________________________________________

OTHER TWITTER DEVOTEES HAVE GOTTEN IN ON THE FUN:

01)
John Kyl has been known to moon random strangers and forget to pull up his pants later.

02)
Jon Kyl has nice tits.


03)
Jon Kyl knows it backwards & front.


(04)
Jon Kyl voted most likely to be a lying scumbag by well over 90% of Phi Beta Kappa honor society members

(05)
The brown stain around John Kyl's mouth is from chocolate milk.


(06)
Jon Kyl has proposed an amendment to the Bible, making it immoral to tax the wealthy.

(07)
"If I have to I will stick my head in every uterus." - Senator Jon Kyl.


(08)
Jon Kyl sold his soul to the devil and Satan asked for a refund


(09)
John Kyl discovered he could travel backwards in time by shoving his head up his ass.

(10)
Jon Kyl has a flying pig farm. All flying pigs are locally grown from his ass and USDA approved.

(11)
John Kyl's favourite hobby is kicking puppies with kittens taped to his shoes.


(12)
Jon Kyl gave Clarence Thomas the Coke can he later gave to Anita Hill.


(13)
Jon Kyl is leaving the Republican party, he finds their pandering to corporate interests "disgusting".

(16)
Jon Kyl knew the original AIDS monkey intimately.


(17)
John Kyl wants to grind the bones of the poor to make his bread.


___________________________________________________________________________________

I NEED TO COMMENT ON ONE ADDITIONAL COLBERT POST:

Jon Kyl actually prefers Hydrox to Oreos.

___________________________________________________________________________________

I DON'T KNOW, THAT MIGHT BE TRUE.




THIS ENTIRE POST IS OFFICIALLY LABELED AS: 

NOT INTENDED TO BE A FACTUAL STATEMENT




TV TOY MEMORIES




Posted by Ron D at 4/19/2011 7:57 AM
Categories: Pop Culture, Advertisement, Politics, Humorous, Celebrity
Tags: advertisements food advertising humor magazine ads nostalgic Pop Culture politics sarcasm vintage advertising
 

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