BREAKING NEWS: UNDERWEAR MODELS ON COMMODITY EXCHANGE FLOOR, CAUSING LOSS OF BLOOD FLOW TO THE BROKER'S BRAINS
I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT THE HIGH COST OF OIL AND GASOLINE WAS BECAUSE OF THE BIG BANKS (CITIGROUP, CHASE, WELLS FARGO, etc) TRADING CONTRACTS BACK, AND FORTH.
"I'LL BUY YOUR CONTRACT, IF YOU BUY MINE," COMPLETED WITH ONLY A 10% DOWN PAYMENT. VERY LITTLE RISK, BUT A HUMONGOUS GAIN FOR THEM (a HUMONGOUS loss for everybody else.)
THE TRADING IS THE MAJOR CAUSE OF THE MASSIVE INCREASE OF GASOLINE, AND THE HUGE SWINGS IN THE PRICE, FROM ONE SEASON, TO THE NEXT. JUST THE SAME, I BELIEVE I HAVE COME UP WITH A SECOND REASON.
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LOSS OF BLOOD FLOW TO THE BRAIN OF THE COMMODITY BROKERS.
UNDERWEAR MODELS ON THE EXCHANGE FLOOR, ARE CAUSING THE BROKER'S BLOOD TO PERMANENTLY FLOW AROUND THEIR MIDSECTION. THE FLAUNTING OF THE YOUNG LADIES (and, Antonio Banderas - for 10% of the brokers) "ASSETS" ARE HAVING EFFECTS ON THE "RISE" & FALLS OF THE MARKET. REDUCED BLOOD FLOW TO THE BRAIN IS THE MAJOR REASON CAUSING THE HUGE GASOLINE SPIKES.
MY MANTRA IS: NO MORE HALF-DRESSED UNDERWEAR MODELS ON THE COMMODITY SELLING FLOOR. GASOLINE HAS GOTTEN TOO HIGH.
OF COURSE, THERE IS ONE OTHER SOLUTION.
CASTRATE THEM.
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"I'LL BUY YOUR CONTRACT, IF YOU BUY MINE," COMPLETED WITH ONLY A 10% DOWN PAYMENT. VERY LITTLE RISK, BUT A HUMONGOUS GAIN FOR THEM (a HUMONGOUS loss for everybody else.)
THE TRADING IS THE MAJOR CAUSE OF THE MASSIVE INCREASE OF GASOLINE, AND THE HUGE SWINGS IN THE PRICE, FROM ONE SEASON, TO THE NEXT. JUST THE SAME, I BELIEVE I HAVE COME UP WITH A SECOND REASON.
_____________________________________________________________________
LOSS OF BLOOD FLOW TO THE BRAIN OF THE COMMODITY BROKERS.
UNDERWEAR MODELS ON THE EXCHANGE FLOOR, ARE CAUSING THE BROKER'S BLOOD TO PERMANENTLY FLOW AROUND THEIR MIDSECTION. THE FLAUNTING OF THE YOUNG LADIES (and, Antonio Banderas - for 10% of the brokers) "ASSETS" ARE HAVING EFFECTS ON THE "RISE" & FALLS OF THE MARKET. REDUCED BLOOD FLOW TO THE BRAIN IS THE MAJOR REASON CAUSING THE HUGE GASOLINE SPIKES.
MY MANTRA IS: NO MORE HALF-DRESSED UNDERWEAR MODELS ON THE COMMODITY SELLING FLOOR. GASOLINE HAS GOTTEN TOO HIGH.
OF COURSE, THERE IS ONE OTHER SOLUTION.
CASTRATE THEM.
Tweet
Posted by Ron D at 9/8/2011 10:53 AM 
Categories: Pop Culture, Advertisement, Humorous
Tags: advertisements gasoline prices humor magazine ads sarcasm vintage advertising
Categories: Pop Culture, Advertisement, Humorous
Tags: advertisements gasoline prices humor magazine ads sarcasm vintage advertising
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